Second babies

No, I'm not contemplating my second! But as my daughter is two and a half, we have several friends who have just had their second child. And they all have very similar things to say about the experience:

1. They've all also got a boisterous toddler, so baby no.2 doesn't get as much attention as baby no.1 did.

2. They didn't feel that their lives changed as much after having no.2 as it did the first time around. After the first one your life is turned upside-down and it changes completely. By the time you have no.2 your life has already changed to accommodate a child, so the difference isn't nearly as dramatic.

3. As they've done it before they are much more relaxed as mothers. When their first baby cried they rushed to pick them up immediately, but with the second, they know that no harm will come to them if they let them cry for a little bit - and this is just as well, as there are times when they just have to run after their toddler!

Because of their previous experience they're also less concerned about other things that would have worried them as a first-time mum.

4. They're much more active much sooner after having no.2. With your first child you're a bit scared to leave the house in case they get too cold/too hot/you drop them etc... But with no.2, not only are you more confident, but you need to get out of the house anyway to keep child no.1 busy or take them to pre-school or to their other activities. And staying at home all the time with two kids is probably inadvisable!

5. Because baby no.2 doesn't get as much attention as baby no.1 did, is used to sharing their parents, and probably also because mum is more relaxed, no.2 is a more contented, less demanding, easier baby!

I'm sure lots of people would disagree with these experiences, but this is how it's been for five of my friends. I'm hoping that if one day we do decide to have another baby, then our experiences will be very similar!